Why Asking for Help in Your Job Search Isn’t as Scary as You Think
Reaching out for help during a job search can feel intimidating. Whether it’s asking someone to help with your career materials, introduce you to a contact, or provide career advice, you might worry about appearing needy or as if don’t know what you’re doing. But here’s the truth: Asking for help is not only normal, and it can also be the smartest move you make. Here’s why:
You Don’t Know Everyone—And That’s OK
Even the most outgoing people in the world can’t know everyone. And while it might feel awkward to approach someone new, expanding your network is often the key to uncovering new opportunities. Admitting you don’t have all the connections you need is not a weakness. It’s an opportunity. Most people are willing to help when approached with respect and authenticity.
You’re Not Bothering People as Much as You Think
You might hesitate to reach out because you worry about irritating someone. But here’s the reality: If you’re thoughtful about who you ask and how you approach them, most people are happy to help. As someone who’s been asked for help by acquaintances and even strangers, I can tell you that most people find satisfaction in giving back.
Of course, it’s important to approach others the right way. Instead of sending a hasty or demanding email, take the time to craft a respectful and specific message. This simple effort goes a long way in ensuring your request feels considerate, not intrusive. If you’re unsure how to reach out, use AI (e.g., Chat GPT, Gemini, etc.) to obtain a template message that is effective and professional.
You Don’t Have to Return the Favor Right Away (or at All)
One of the hardest parts of asking for help is the feeling that you owe something in return. While it’s natural to want to reciprocate immediately, most people aren’t keeping score.
Professionals are usually happy to lend a hand simply because they’ve been in your shoes before. They find satisfaction in paying it forward, and they don’t expect you to return the favor right away—or even at all. (Bonus points if you send a thank-you note afterwards.) And when you’re in a position to help someone in the future, you can pass along the goodwill.
Paying It Forward
I remember the first time I asked for someone’s help in a job search. I can still feel the perspiration on my hands as I wrote the email. But that person ended up being the person to get me in a company’s doors – and land me the job.
Each time I’ve asked for help in my career, I’m so glad I did. One of my personal mantras in life, is to “Pay It Forward.” And I let people know when they help me, I’ll share their guidance or offer the same assistance to someone else. I also follow up with them know when I did pay it forward, so they can experience that feeling again of how rewarding it is to help others. There’s no better feeling for the person that helped you, than to know you passed along their advice or support.
So don’t let fear or pride hold you back. None of us have all the answers. Reach out for assistance—and enjoy the benefits of fast tracking your progress.
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